


Never Seek

by serafine



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Gen, Vignette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-06
Updated: 2013-01-06
Packaged: 2017-11-23 21:19:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/626630
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/serafine/pseuds/serafine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Original Header:<br/>Spoilers: Triangle<br/>Classification: Vignette, MSR<br/>Rating: G<br/>Setting: Sometime within season six.  Mulder's racking up more hospital bills, as usual.<br/>Feedback: food for the soul and good for your karma.<br/>Archiving: Anywhere would be fabulous - just please let me know so I can visit.<br/>Disclaimer: I just finished with grad school - no profit, no foul, no money, no sue.<br/>Also - I know virtually nothing about the way things are done in hospitals.  If this is wrong, I'm sorry.<br/>Posting Date: 7/29/00</p>
    </blockquote>





	Never Seek

**Author's Note:**

> Original Header:  
> Spoilers: Triangle  
> Classification: Vignette, MSR  
> Rating: G  
> Setting: Sometime within season six. Mulder's racking up more hospital bills, as usual.  
> Feedback: food for the soul and good for your karma.  
> Archiving: Anywhere would be fabulous - just please let me know so I can visit.  
> Disclaimer: I just finished with grad school - no profit, no foul, no money, no sue.  
> Also - I know virtually nothing about the way things are done in hospitals. If this is wrong, I'm sorry.  
> Posting Date: 7/29/00

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Scully was keeping watch at Mulder's bedside.

It was a vigil that had become more than familiar to her over the years of their partnership.  It was never one she cherished, but always a duty she fulfilled.  Looking at her watch, she groaned at the time - 10:30 in the evening.  She had not made it home the night before, and had spent a good portion of the day at the office readying reports, and tying up the loose ends of the case.

Yawning, she stretched and realized how dry her mouth was - oh, how she wanted some coffee.  Reaching down, Scully pulled her wallet out of her purse, and found it empty.  No cash, only credit cards and I.D.  <sigh>

Scully reached back down to her purse and got Mulder's wallet out of it.  They had given it to her that morning, along with his watch.  
   
Flipping it open, she pulled out a dollar bill.  An old piece of folded paper came with it.  Unfolding it, she quirked an eyebrow.  It was a poem, scrawled in Mulder's handwriting, labeled as being by William Blake, but it was one she hadn't read.

 "Never seek to tell thy love  
  Love that never told can be;  
  For the gentle wind does move  
  Silently, invisibly.

  I told my love, I told my love,  
  I told her all my heart,  
  Trembling, cold, in ghastly fears--  
  Ah, she doth depart.

  Soon as she was gone from me  
  A traveller came by  
  Silently, invisibly--  
  O, was no deny."

It looked like it had been in his wallet for a while.  The corners were worn, and the creases had almost turned into cuts, as if he would often pull it out and read it.  Scully looked at Mulder, almost as if seeing him for the first time. 

She remembered with shame her response to him in the hospital after his little trip into the Triangle.  She had blown him off and never taken his words seriously.   Apparently it had been a little more than the drugs talking that night, and she hadn't wanted to consider it.   
  
Could it be true?  Had she managed to blindly ignore him all these years? 

Scully cared deeply for him - no doubting that. And he was a rather attractive man, his occasional awful haircuts notwithstanding. 

Did she have the guts to ask him about it when he woke up?   Nope. He was unconscious now, but she knew he would be able to hear her.

Leaning over, she whispered in his ear, "I'm sorry, Mulder.  I should have listened to you in Florida.  Try it again.  I think this time you'll find a much better reception."  Pulling a pen out of her purse, she wrote on the back of the poem, *I'm no longer afraid*

Smiling to herself, she put the paper back in his wallet, and dropped it down into her purse.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

the end

thanks for reading

serafine

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Author's Notes:

"Never Seek to Tell Thy Love" by William Blake (1757-1827)  
Taken from the collection edited by Dante Gabriel Rossetti,  first published in 1863.

I first saw this poem last year in a song in choir - a beautiful, melodramatic SATB arrangement with piano - and it's been playing through my mind ever since.  It just seemed to fit Mulder's insecure heart so well.  Hope you enjoyed it. =)


End file.
